Mr. Maust,

Your passport was found in a donation at the Sharing Shop.

You found my what? I didn’t know it was lost!

The above is an email I received tonight notifying me that my passport had been donated to (and found at) the seminary’s thrift store, the Sharing Shop. The first thing I thought was, “Oh shoot, how did that happen?!” So, I go over to the file cabinet and look in the folder where our passports live, open up the little traveler’s pouch just to make sure they’ve indeed found my passport, and behold there’s my passport safe in the pouch in the file cabinet. This is confusing. I’ve got my passport and they’ve got my passport. My world starts to come crashing down as I begin to question the nature of physics (i.e., an item can’t be in two different locations at the same time).

The email had a number. I’ll call it. Will there be a terrorist on the other line holding my “passport” ransom? Stranger has happened in Wake Forest. Just today I walked outside and it smelled of sulfur, the scent of a missing passport (apparently).

“Hello?”

“Hello.”

“I got your email saying you have my passport, but I’ve got it in my hand.”

“Oh, well, let me get it out of my briefcase and take a look then.” Terrorists have briefcases don’t they?

“This one has holes punched in it on the first page. There was also a picture of a ‘Justin’.”

I know that “Justin” and that’s my old passport! Emily in her ruthless ridding our apartment of non-essentials gave my old backpack to the Sharing Shop which was secretly stowing my old passport and a picture of Justin. Oops. I’m just relieved there aren’t terrorists in Wake Forest!